I have no idea if it is acceptable to write a prologue on a blog, but it’s my blog, so I can make up the rules right?!

My coach, ¹Kim Carroll, Director of ²Animal Justice Academy told me about 21 seeds during our chat one day.  I was impatient, as many ethical vegans are, that change isn’t happening fast enough.  It can be heartbreaking to live in a world that seems to celebrate animal cruelty, though most people do not see it that way.  Kim said, on average, it takes a person 21 seeds to awaken and for me to think of my activism like ‘planting seeds.’  This was an immensely helpful analogy for me as I embark on my activism/animal advocate journey so that I don’t get burnt out.

With my new mindset, I feel I have finally come home to myself, my true nature and who I was meant to be.  My yoga teacher Stephanie Nosco said in a class recently that one of the best parts about her Yin Yoga teacher trainings has not been that people become teachers, though that is wonderful.  She said that it has been great to watch people become ‘more like themselves’ and she specifically mentioned her pride that one of her students has become an animal rights activist.  I’ve never been so proud to receive a mention and she is absolutely right; I am now more like myself.  I’m proud of who I am.

As I reflect on my own personal story, I can see a multitude of seeds have been planted for me and I had clusters of seeds start to appear during Covid-19 (“Covid”).  Future blog posts will be about the many seeds that helped awaken me, but today I’d like to share a precious story about my Opa – HOW CUTE IS HE?!

July 2018 – Opa’s 90th Surprise Birthday Party

After almost having a nervous breakdown at my job, I decided to leave the company I planned on retiring with in May 2018.  As of July 2018, I had been in my new job for two months and was still coming down from experiences at my prior job.  I was struggling with my weight more than ever and didn’t quite have the space in my brain to be able to do anything about it.  I was in survival mode.

My cousin Renee hosted an early 90^th birthday party for my Opa and my brother Steve and his girlfriend Sofia were taking pictures of the celebration.  I arrived in a dress I had purchased from a thrift store, since much of the clothes in my closet didn’t fit and I needed something that would give me some breathing room.  I didn’t like the dress at all, but at 248 lbs., my criteria for clothes was as long as it fit, I would purchase it.

Upon arrival, I greeted my Opa and he leaned in to whisper something in my ear.  I was speechless by what he had to say and I said nothing in return and meandered towards my brother Steve after greeting Opa.

My brother Steve proudly showed me a picture on his camera.

Steve:  Look, I captured this nice moment between you and Opa!

Me, horrified:  Oh great.

Steve:  Don’t you like the picture?

Me:  Definitely not.

Steve:  Why?

Me:  Because you managed to capture on camera the exact moment Opa told me that I was the largest weight he had seen me in his whole life.

Steve:  What?!  Oh.

Me:  Yeah.

Then we laughed about it and couldn’t believe Opa’s straightforwardness.

This was one of the first seeds planted that I needed to do something about my health. This was an important seed as I had to first start caring about myself, before I could let what happens to the animals enter my consciousness.

While the seed here was planted, it didn’t take root until 2020.  It wasn’t until I started to lose weight and get back to health that I reflected back on this moment with absolute pride and gratitude for my Opa’s bravery in speaking up.

You can see from the picture that my Opa is telling me this with utmost compassion.  He didn’t know how to finesse his words, but his body language screams I’m telling you this because I care.  He leans in close so no one else can hear what he wanted to share, he has his hand on my back, a gesture of care and concern.  His eyes are soft and he’s covering his mouth with his hand to share with me as gently as possible.  Unfortunately, you can also see the look on my face is not receiving the information well at the time!

I so treasure this picture and feel utterly blessed my brother snapped it and for my Opa for telling me the truth, though it was hard to hear at the time.

If you are a planter of seeds, please be patient, you never know when they will take root and grow. How I wish my Opa was here to see my transformation, but isn’t that how it goes. We don’t often get to see our seeds take root but if you plant enough, some will grow.

Peace, love & plants,

Michelle 🙂

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¹Coach Kim Carroll has been pivotal in my journey as an animal advocate and anyone looking for a coach could benefit from her services.

²Animal Justice Academy has an amazing FREE for course for anyone who wants to make the world a better place for animals, you do not have to be vegan to sign up.